But upon returning to Colorado I was frusterated to learn that I had gained it all back. All 7 lbs. But at least I didn't gain more than my starting weight, I guess that could be the silver lining there.....that is if you look really hard for it.
But I told myself, that I was not going to allow that gain back get to me. Although as frusterating as it is, I don't want to get side tracked and stop my weightloss journey.
I had a friend tell me not to look at it as a "diet" and to allow myself to "cheat" just a little but only every so often. She told me if I look at it as I'm on a diet and I limit what I can eat and I don't allow myself to have a cheat time, then I will fall back into my old ways. The way she had said it to me, it made sense. So I decided to not completely limit myself, but instead just to use moderation AND to eat as healthy as I can. But to not forget that i can "cheat" a little, just as long as I do in moderation. Small "cheats" if you will.
I'm starting my slimquick pills again. Even though I wanted to lose weight without using diet pills, I think I need a jump start. Something to help give me a little push, but I defineatly don't want to rely on pills to help me lose weight. But I think sometimes, especially with knowing what weight I am starting at, I may need a little help. More so because we have set a wedding date and my time period to lose weight has been shortened.
Well, I had always thought my due date for my weight loss was my husbands homecoming, which in a way it is. I want to lose a good amount of weight and get more toned by the time he gets home. But now I need to lose about 3 inches off my waist which is my main trouble area. When I was in California, I tried on my wedding dress and I know what I need to do to fit in it better. We have set a date for June 30th, 2012.
So, now I'm in a time crunch to lose enough weigh before my wedding. I'm not giving myself a goal weight, because it doesn't matter the weight on the scale. It just matters what I look like, how I feel and that I fit in my dress. Ok, techinically I fit into it, but I want to lose weight to look better in it. But also to lose weight to feel better, healthier. Plus, after working out tonight....I know that even on the worst most lonely nights of this deployment....working out ALWAYS makes you feel better. Guarenteed. Remember that ladies, on the days you feel like you can possibly get out of bed....get up...workout....and I know you will feel better and stronger. =)
Now, on to a different subject. I FINALLY enrolled Lily into dog training. Its way overdue thats for sure. She is now 11 months old and has had no puppy training whats-so-ever. That was a mistake on my part. I should have enrolled her months ago. Now, she is crazy puppy and I swear I think she has ADD. No, really, I think she does. When I take her out to go potty, she will sniff everything and wonder around as much as she can anyway since I have her on a leash. She gets so distracted by anything, even a moving leaf that she won't go. I know probably tmi, but seriously she is driving me CRAZY! Literally one time she was about to go and someone walked outside and she STOPPED. Oh my lord.
But today I took her to the dog park. Hoping we could stay later today, because yesterday it was so cold I couldn't stand out there. I knew once I could no longer feel my legs....it was time to go home. So, today I was hoping we could stay there for more than 15 minutes. I want her to run around and get her energy out, because then she's not such a pain in my butt for the rest of the day.
But today, she was running around with another dog. Then the owner went to her car to get a bowl. She put some water in it for her dog to drink. I saw Lily run toward the gate opening. I walked over to make sure Lily wouldn't run out or bother her. But I didn't get there in time. The lady opened the gate with the bowl in one hand, she held it up but to close to her chest and...here comes Lily....she jumped on her and there goes the water....all over the front of her sweatshirt. I wanted to shoot Lily. I knew the whole jumping thing is a problem with her, but she mostly saves that for me. How lucky am I?
I told the woman I was so sorry. She said it was ok, but her face said it all. She looked so pissed. So I chased after Lily, got her on the leash and took her home. I immediatly called the dog training school and signed her up. Its funny, I can handle a toddler....tantrums, crying, screaming, dipaers...you name it.....BUT....I have no idea how to handle a hyper puppy. I joked with my husband that I would take a child any day over this dog. As much as I love her, she is SO much work. Hopefully, training will help her because at this point I think it will be a long time before we can have children. We have talked about starting after few months after he gets home, but theres no way I could handle a child and Lily. Not to mention I don't trust her with small children. She just gets to excited and I would be afraid of her jumping and knocking the child down.
Well, that is all for today. Its been a busy and productive day and I am tired.
Homecoming is getting closer and closer.....I swear I can see the finish line now. 2012....has given me so much hope. I know now how much closer I am to having my husband back. How close I am to having the other half of my heart home.
Life is beautiful <3
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